12.11.2010

Best Craigslist Post

I just laughed my butt off. Please read this current craigslist posting:


For Sale: Worst Cat EVER (Davis County)


Date: 2010-11-12, 5:37PM MST
Reply to: comm-kxns3-2057295036@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]


Please take my cat. I have owned him five years and I think it's someone else's turn to have to put up with him. He opens kitchen cupboards and eats ANYTHING he can find inside. I mean ANYTHING. So far he has eaten cornmeal, rice (uncooked), bars of soap, entire loaves of bread, boxes of cereal, pop-tarts, pudding cups (yes he gnaws his way through the plastic), entire tubs of margarine, carrots, apples, a mango AND THE PAPER BAG IT WAS IN, boxes of uncooked spaghetti, bags of powdered sugar, animal crackers, whole raw eggs, and many many many cookies. YES I FEED THIS CAT REGULARLY. I have to keep my kitchen completely spotless and have child locks on all my cupboards, but he's learned how to fish stuff out with his paws. Not to mention all the garbages in the whole house. While I was typing this he snuck in behind me JUST NOW and licked the hot loaf of bread that is cooling on my stove. It's literally three feet away from me.

On the bright side he hasn't eaten any bananas yet.

He is a NICE CAT. He is soft and purrs and is cuddly and loving and would EAT YOU ALIVE IF YOU SUFFERED A STROKE OR HEART ATTACK AND WERE UNABLE TO DEFEND YOURSELF.

I would let him live outside--he LOVES to go out--but he eats birds and that makes me sad.

SO!

Maybe you live on take-out? You don't cook? You own a barn full of mice? You already have magnetized locks on all your cupboards for your toddlers? This cat loves people and gets along with other cats and dogs. Let me know if you want him!!

  • Location: Davis County
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
image 2057295036-0

2 comments:

  1. hahahahahahahahaha. maybe I should take this cat. Start my cat collection early...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hahaha, oh my gosh, I just peed my pants laughing. That's the coolest cat ever.

    ReplyDelete